Thursday, October 11, 2012

My Friend Ray Sharkey, Fallen Idol


“No more than a wisp of dust”
Ray Sharkey was the guy who got away…who fled the desolation that dragged so many of us into early graves. He ran but could not escape the plague within. The Ray I remember was half-Irish, with a long nose, sparkling eyes, pockmarked skin and voice like a rasp. He grew up in a row house on the dark side of the Gowanus in the shadow of the decaying Expressway near the Battery Tunnel. His father, a doorman, slipped out when Ray was five. His mother pampered him; his nonna sang to him in Italian. You can see shards of his Brooklyn childhood, glittering and brittle, in Taylor Hackford’s film, The Idolmaker.

Mornings, Ray and I would walk together up Union Street to all-boys St. Augustine High School on Park Place. Walked past the stoop where a Tuinal-enraged distant relative named “Boy-Boy” stabbed a Puerto Rican to death for playing a guitar. Heads back, shoulders rolling, we strolled, wearing our purple and white letterman’s sweaters with the big “A” sewn above the pocket. Letters, earned not on the field, court or track, but for selling indulgences, a practice that triggered the Protestant Reformation. We pestered the dry, doddering, sinless Episcopalians who still dominated Park Slope into giving us cash money in return for prayers, unnumbered and at unknown intervals like Swiss bank accounts for their salvation.  A $100 —my father earned less in a week unloading ships on the Red Hook piers—and the Christian Brothers named you a “Centurion.”

In a neighborhood where everyone—from Angioletti, the singsong fruit peddler, to the gamblers on the corner—shouted like performers in some sidewalk opera, Ray was a loudmouth. Intense, histrionic, given to breaking out in a quavering doo-wop falsetto at a moment’s notice. He was a few years younger than I and best friends with my brother Joey. Summers, Ray, Joey and a short, curly-haired, granite-jawed football player named Raymond Brocco, would head to Brighton Beach, slather themselves with baby oil and iodine; smoke, ingest and inhale every combination of alcohol and pharmaceutical, and roast themselves unconscious on teeny towels while trying to pick up Jewish girls from Ocean Parkway. I can still smell the salt tang and the sand cool under my feet in the boardwalk’s shade.  No question, Ray was part of the frantic, gang-bang, romantic-violent Gowanus mix— lost boys like my cousins JuJu, Jimmy Psycho, Popeye Anthony and Richie Mel—but he hung back, absorbed and observed, mined and mastered all the pain and hurt.
Or so I thought.

I now know that flight never means escape, and transcendence is not forever. A madness still sings in my veins. Ray never finished high school, never became a Centurion. He caught a performance of Hair in Manhattan—an alien place we called “the City”—and surely as Saul of Tarsus, knew his place. He plunged into acting with my handsome and doomed brother Thomas, studying with Uta Hagen at HB Studio. Had he read his Chaucer at Saint Augustine, Ray might have recognized the revelers in the Pardoner’s Tale determined to triumph over Death…might have recognized that Death manifests in seductive guises.

On a Sunday afternoon in the spring of ‘73, Ray showed up driving a 356 Porsche—maybe one of the sports cars Anthony Lips stole and swapped VIN numbers from wrecks rusting in Stuckey’s Staten Island salvage yard. The gualiones ("wallyos"--in dialect) gathered outside Monte’s restaurant, scratched their crotches, threw make-believe punches, laughed, dug the car. Ray basked in the attention. With him, a long-haired, bellbottomed Puerto Rican Golden Gloves champ named Chu-Chu Malave. No Sancho Panza he. My mother served platters of ravioli, meatballs, braciole, sausage, roast chicken, salad, cannoli from Cioffi’s on Union near Columbia Street. Old Man Stuto’s homemade wine flowed. Ray entertained us.  He begged Joey to come along (“Fuckin’ California, man!”) but my brother was already passing into the limbo he’d inhabit the rest of his life. Mom warned Ray to “be a good boy.” He laughed his crazy laugh.
And roared away.

I didn’t see Ray Sharkey for ten years. My world had changed. Somehow, I'd graduated from Columbia University's Graduate School of Journalism. In 1982, Newsweek dispatched me to Los Angeles to write a profile of this hot new movie star. My colleague, David Friendly, put me up in the Beverly Hills Hotel. Ray had just won the Golden Globe award as Best Motion Picture Actor and critics were raving over his searing portrayal of impresario Bob Marcucci, the man who loosed Fabian and Frankie Avalon upon the world. Pauline Kael called him “the next Jimmy Cagney.” I never knew Cagney or Marcucci, but I recognized Ray Sharkey, the Ray who ached for recognition and respect, who, if you looked closely, leaked desperation like a sieve. I smiled at the clotheslined backyards of Gowanus tenements trying to pass for South Philly. No question, Ray’s nod to the old neighborhood.

“Where’s your brother?” he shouted when I arrived. “These neighborhood guys…they got a stupid apartment…they got a car…they’re fucking some girl on the side. That’s all there is to life? Tell him to get out here! I’ll give him a job. He stays with me! No problem.” He closed his fist and thrust his thumb in the air like a guarantee.

His life was changed, but not transcended. The Idolmaker was a box office disappointment. Still, Ray was living on the beach in Malibu. He’d dated the Italian actress Ornella Muti, far and away the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. He was living with a very good-looking blonde. “Mienca, her family owns Kellogg’s cereal!” he confided when we were alone, shaking his open hand like it was on fire. “You believe that shit?” He rode motorcycles with Stallone and Gary Busey. He wore a stupid bandanna to cover his thinning hair.  In a few years, TV audiences would know him as Sonny Steelgrave in Wiseguy. He’d make appearances on Miami Vice…on Crime Story, dozens of shows and movies.  He was only 29-years-old. He had 10 years to live.

“Yo, come with me,” he said before I could start our interview. This would be a pattern over the next days, my deadline clock tick-tick-ticking away. We drove, we ate Fatburgers, he bought a VCR—I’d never seen one—and showed me tapes of his work. His characters tended to be named “Vinnie.” I liked that. He’d finished Some Kind of Hero, a film about dysfunctional former POWs, co-starring , of all people, Richard Pryor. A POW camp, real or imagined, is hardly a therapeutic environment “Madonna! we spent a lot of time getting into character,” Ray allowed.

For three days, he danced, he deflected, he feinted and fell back on the old dese and dose tough guy clichés.  I didn’t have the heart or maybe the skill to press him. I had one brother dying of AIDS, another a junkie, a third an out-of-control gambler with wise guys hot on his trail. I wasn’t making such smart life choices myself. Really, what could I ask?  His manager, Herb Nanas, only saw blue skies. Giuseppe, his hairstylist, pronounced Ray “tanned and fit.” Other sources didn’t bother to return my calls. To me, Hollywood is a very hard nut to crack, far harder than the Pentagon, Washington or Wall Street.  My story was put on hold, indefinitely.  

I always knew I would fall—big time,” Ray once said. By 1991, it was big time. Like so many peers and family members who’d come of age in the streets along the Gowanus, and with so much at his fingertips, Ray Sharkey had become a full-blown heroin addict. Not coke like everyone else in Hollywood. Heroin, straight out of the gutters and shooting galleries of Red Hook. Strung-out, trailing a string of arrests, ODs, car wrecks, failed rehabs, lies, lurid gossip, destroyed marriages. He burned through a million dollars that year, got busted in Vancouver and fired from an acting gig, the unforgivable sin a business willing to look every other way as long as you put asses in the seats. The impenetrable shield Hollywood extends over its own was cracking.

Ray wasn’t done yet. It was the Age of AIDS, not Aquarius. And Sharkey was an IV drug user. When an actress named Elena Monica, daughter of the comedian, Corbett Monica, filed an all-too-public lawsuit accusing Sharkey—who’d mysteriously had lost 40 lbs.—of infecting her with the AIDS virus in the course of a brief relationship, he had nowhere else to run. To his shame, he stayed in denial to the end—he could barely stand when Monica showed up to confront him--even after his manager revealed the truth. Shortly after, Ray returned to Brooklyn to die with his mother. Tough as nails, Cecelia shielded him to the very end. He passed away on June 11, 1993. Witnesses remember him as no more than “a wisp of dust.”

I was reminded of Ray Sharkey in the summer of 2012 when I’d volunteered to write the narration for a documentary being shot in Atlanta. The Narrator turned out to be Tovah Feldshuh who'd played Ray Sharkey’s love interest in his breakthrough film, The Idolmaker, thirty years before. Tovah is quite lovely and has had both a good life and a successful career, most recently the star of Golda’s Balcony, the longest running one-woman play in Broadway history. Of course, we talked about Ray. Tovah was one of those good-looking, well-bred Jewish girls Sharkey would have loved to seduce.

And I wondered once again why our lives insist on unfolding the way they do. Tovah is happily married, with a husband and grown children. She lives on Central Park West and grew up in affluent Scarsdale. Ray and I by the pestilent Gowanus, a Superfund site. Her father was an attorney. Ray’s absentee father a doorman; mine a dockworker given to violent rages. Is it destiny, nurture, nature (a chaos gene that selects for creativity and torment)? Or the fact we lived in a self-contained, through-the-looking-glass world where teachers, police, clergy, and other authority figues were corrupt or uncaring...and mafia guys our role models? It's all beyond my ken, save for the ache I feel when I remember Ray as he once was. As my brothers once were.  For all his brilliance—and there is no question that Ray was brilliant— Sharkey sleeps in a lonely grave in a forgotten town on Long Island.


Image result for ray sharkey grave


31 comments:

  1. What a sad tale.

    I first noticed Sharkey in a Country Music Video by K T Oslin. "Mary and Willie".

    His story reminds me of something James Brown said about Little Willie John;

    "When he found his trouble in life, I heard the quiet come down".

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  2. Vince: this is vintage coppola. What a great memory you still have , matched only by your insights into the human condition. Great work.

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  3. I remember Sharkey popping up in character roles in second rate 80s movies and as main characters in a handful of HBO movies. Never knew his name until I saw an old SNL he hosted 30 years later on Hulu. Then I saw Idolmaker on Netflix. His ability was evident. Nature and nurture both capped him and apparently those closest to him. Sad but fitting he played Steelgrave.

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  4. Anyone who knowingly infected other human beings with (at that time) a death sentence disease IS A SCUMBAG

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  5. I took that photo 1999 when I went to New York to visit Ray's mother. Never had the opportunity to meet him.

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  6. Monica Rose:
    Good to meet you. What was your connection to Sharkey. Best,

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  7. Very well-written, personal piece Mr. Coppola. I remember the downfall and denials of Ray Sharkey well from the early '90s...it was tragic and cruel how he proceeded before his death. For the two decades since his death I have refused to watch anything he acted in because I was upset by his lack of humanity; then I realized that he suffered from a cool ignorance that helped him cope and move forward yet passively aggressively punished others when he felt they "dissed" him. I wanted to share 'Cop & ½ " with my 8 year old daughter and decided I wouldn't hold the grudge against Mr. Sharkey anymore for the pain/disease he caused others but in the future use it as a lesson for my daughter on the cruelties of this world. Your piece was heart-felt and genuine and gave a somber understanding of Mr.Sharkey and turned my utter distain for him into a future-forward positive. Thank you!

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    1. Thank you FoxCrush, appreciate the kind words.

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  8. Brilliant and touching piece, Vince. The Gowanus was no Grand Canal, but it did give you something rich.

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  9. Does anyone know what happened to Ray's younger brother John Sharkey. He's about 46 years old. I am an old friend and have been looking for him to get back in touch. If anyone knows how I can contact John please let me know. My name is Sandy 732-425-4119

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  10. In my time I knew 3 men with Aids my wife reminds me that of the 3, two were in denial, 1 lived 20+ with the disease, all three were very bad men, I can't Image the Death and Destruction they caused in their wake, I was draw-en to this story reading that his Daughter was just arrested for the murder of her Mother in-law, 09/26/2015.. Sometime we just go with bad decisions in life.  Sharkey sleeps in a lonely grave in a forgotten town on Long Island. As well he should.

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  11. Elena Monica spoke about Ray Sharkey and her having HIV at Southern Connecticut State u back in the early 90's when I was a sophomore. I never knew what happened to her after that but knew she was stunning and brave.

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    1. She is alive and well living in Florida and has 4 kids

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  12. The sins of the father have now been visited upon his daughter: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/daughter-actor-ray-sharkey-pleads-not-guilty-murder-article-1.2386455

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  13. Thank you Mr. Coppola for writing this.
    -Rasec

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  14. Jesus, so depressing... I knew Ray in the late 1970s; I was working my first gig as a Production Assistant on the film WHO'LL STOP THE RAIN in which Ray played a supporting role as a psycho hood. None of Ray's personal bad habits interfered with his work ethic at that time and he was a hoot to be around. We hung out together a lot when we got to location in Mexico and traded stories about our respective drug problems. I thought Ray's, like mine, were in the past but I found out a few years later that Ray's problems were back in full force. I asked a mutual friend from that shoot how to get in touch with Ray and he told me under no circumstances should I -- that Ray would bleed me dry and probably drag me down with him. I feel kind of shitty now that I listened to that person's advice and never saw Ray again. I remember a lot of our times together but I especially remember listening to Ray sing and complimenting him that his timing and tone was so much like Mel Torme, "The Velvet Fog." Ray wasn't sure if that was a compliment or a put-down -- he'd never heard of Mel Torme. That really shocked me. I still think of Ray often and feel a deep pit in my stomach when I think of what he could have accomplished... Here's to hoping you found peace, my friend...

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  15. Hey CJG, You did what you could at the time; my brother Joe was Ray's best friend, like Ray he was beyond reach. Like you I have no idea of the pain these guys were in...Thank you and all the others for adding pieces to the mosaic. I, too remember Ray, head back, bopping up the street, not a care in the world, singing for everyone but himself.

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    1. I have been watching the old series Wiseguy. Ray was amazing in the series. When it first came out I was in early recovery from drugs and alcohol. I had hit a very low point in my life. I felt like no one could understand where I was and would my life ever get better. I did not realize Ray had suffered from the same things I was at the time. I have been clean for 35 yrs and help other in sobriety and find some peace in the world. I hope you find some peace as well.

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  16. Dear Vincent, Thank you for your insights into Ray's personality and torment. I have loved him since I saw him in "The Idolmaker" which is tied for my favorite movie (along with "Gladiator" starring Russell Crowe). When I was attending L.A. Valley College and was an extra in a play there ("All the King's Men") one summer, I knew a fellow lady student who had dated Ray. I said, "Wow, you are so lucky!" She couldn't believe I had that opinion and she asked, "Why would you say that?" I thought he was incredible in "The Idolmaker." She said, "So?" Anyway, I lived in the Grass is Greener Syndrome. If I had dated him, I could have gotten AIDS and been dumped in 2 seconds. It would not have been worth it. I still love Ray as an actor though. He was incredible. I've seen "The Idolmaker" over 30x. Powerful movie. I was surprised it didn't do better at the box office but I think the title wasn't right. I only saw it because it was double-billed with "Airplane". Too bad Ray's addiction and denial got the best of him. Too bad his daughter never really had a father. Her life might have turned out differently too. Sad story but enlightening. Sincerely, Linda K.

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  17. Interesting commentary from all of you.
    It's like looking at your life through the lens of a projector that shows only old movies, in black and white with so many memories they overwhelm you in an instant.
    The questions, although many answered over the years, come up with every reply and comment. Does Vincent really know the person he writes about and so fondly remembers? Did anybody in Ray's life really know him? Based on Vincent's accounting, there's nothing left to surmise; only that the man he knew compared to the man Ray became were mirror images gone terribly wrong. Maybe it was fame that did it, maybe it was ego, maybe it was, as Vincent eluded to the insatiable need Ray had to be noticed and accepted... and counted. Maybe it was the disease and his fall from grace. If grace is what you call ego at it's worst (or best). No, I think it was way more simple than this. And although all of these things had a part, I came to realize, in my own journey, that Ray was just a garden variety sociopath.... and that's ok. It's ok because this sociopath's actions were my greatest teacher. The gifts I have gotten from my experience with this person created a complete change in the trajectory of my life. A gift which, to this day, is still evident in my life and for which I am so very grateful. And no, this gift was not wrapped in pretty paper with a bow that said, "come open me." I would never have recognized it for I too was very different; so unaware, feeling so invincible.
    It was a gift that could only have come about by getting knocked over the head by a 2 by 4. It is a gift that I can only surmise that I agreed to accept in some other lifetime with the understanding that I would receive far more than I could have ever expected. For any other acceptance of this gift would have been madness.
    Our greatest tragedy is our greatest teacher.
    Thank You Ray, and for those of you wondering, know that True forgiveness comes when you realize that there was never anything to forgive.

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    1. The Sharkey story keeps coming back to life. Always wanted to tell you how brilliant your insights are.

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    2. Beautifully written.

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  18. sad Elena Monica (last name is now Garafolo) is a live and well living in Florida married with four young kids. she owns her own real estate company. How much do u think she contributed to his daughter's and his famiy's rage claiming that he gave her AIDS and she was dying and got the worlds attention. Then sued his estate for $52 million.

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    1. Is the above reply a question, a sarcastic commentary or??

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    2. This is really shocking to me. That anyone could question what Ms. Monica claimed about Sharkey. The guy was a total loser and infected more women (and maybe men) than just Elena Monica. From what I read, she was told she was dying b/c she had HIV, b/c that's what you were told in 1991 you ignorant idiot. Also, from what I read SHE WAS AWARDED 52M by the state(she didn't sue for it) and was told the only $$ left was what was left in some fruit orchards in Ray's daughter's name. She decided against taking that money, so the story goes. As far as it being anyone else that could've given her the terrible disease; they were dating and he died of AIDS and she got HIV!! What are the chances she HAPPEN to have gotten it from somewhere else, even if she was with someone else, though claims adamantly she was not. It amazes me how people like the above are so committed to their STORY... and for WHAT????

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    3. Most people never knew Elena came to Ray 's home to apologize shortly before he left California to die where he was born,in Brooklyn. There are other things about her that weren't common knowledge that discredit her allegations. Sad he helped so many with recovering from addiction, yet he's remembered by some as a monster.

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    4. His own manager said he probably infected a hundred woman before AIDS took hold. He didn't care and was in denial till the very end. Nice trying to dispel the atrocious monstrous behaviour of a man you don't know who's own friends admitted his bad behaviour.

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  19. Mary Lynch - A quick Google search refutes your claim that Elena Monica apologized to Sharkey. A June 1993 article entitled "Fatal Deceit" featured in People magazine (that is now online in their archive) reported that Monica did in fact visit Sharkey before his death, but did not to apologize to him. She forgave him for infecting her with HIV. The only part you got right was that she visited him in California. Nothing "refutes her allegations" except a handful of people who feel it their duty to post disparing things about Ms. Monica 20+ years after the fact.

The fact remains that Sharkey died of AIDS. He had unprotected sex with several women knowing he was HIV positive. He assured those women he was negative because, "God doesn't want me to get that [disease]." Those women became infected with HIV. The only thing those women had in common was Sharkey. You have to perform some strenuous mental gymnastics to believe that two women who slept with the same man who was infected just happened to get the virus from someone else. How can anyone with an iota of intelligence dismiss the facts that are right in front of them? Because Sharkey was a good looking and talented actor? Because he supposedly helped other drug addicts (how can one person, still in the throws of addiction himself, help another drug addict anyhow)? I do not believe a person should be entirely defined by one or even a series of events, but it is absolutely insane and sickening to dismiss Sharkey's delusional and dangerous behavior and intimate these women are liars. Do you honestly think two young women publicly admitting they contracted HIV did so for funsies or attention? What would anyone even gain from such a lie? Elena Monica didn't get one red cent from her lawsuit because Sharkey was broke. Like it or not, Sharkey's behavior was monstrous. When you do monstrous things and hurt people, it tends to make people call you a monster. Don't want that? Don't hurt people. Easy peasy. 

All that said, I enjoyed reading Mr. Coppola's account of his friendship with Sharkey. As I said above, one shouldn't always be entirely defined by one thing so it is nice to read some positive memories about Sharkey. I'm also glad to hear Elena Monica is doing well and has gone on with her life.

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  20. It's ironic that The Idol Maker is on right now. I often wondered what happened to his daughter (now I know. Wow!).

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  21. Thanks and that i have a dandy supply: How To Plan House Renovation house renovation plans

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  22. RIP to all who passed away from HIV AIDS . May the millions of whom that died be a blessing to their family members and others that recall them . G 🕯️☄️🕯️🔹🙏

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